Santa Claus

Santa Claus, St. Nicholas, Kris Kringle...he has many names, and many meanings to people, myself included.  This Christmas, I've really been thinking about my belief in the big man, and what it has meant to me, and my children.

I have 2 boys, 9 and 7.  The 9 yr old started questioning the existence of Santa last year a little.  He would say things like "I think Santa is more of a spirit of Christmas than actual person".  This year, he's been saying things like "I think Santa is a myth", and what he wants for Christmas is to actually see Santa (that's what he's asked Santa for).  He's also asked me "mom, have you ever lied to me?"  After finding me hiding Easter eggs on Easter, I think the whole "Easter bunny" thing is done.  So this Christmas has been one that I'm sure a lot of parents have to come to at a certain point, "do I tell my kid this year?" 

I've been struggling with this more and more as the season goes on.  Do I tell the older one, explain who St. Nicholas was, and let him in on "the secret", and have him promise not to tell little brother, (which I can imagine his first fight with brother would bring that one straight out), or do I tell both?  Or neither? 

I remember my parents telling my little sister, who was about 6, the story of the "real Santa".  She came home after hearing this story, and the first thing she tells everyone, "Santa's dead."  Harsh words to hear from a 6 yr old!  I was 12 and it hurt to hear that said, kind of like hearing a kid say "I don't believe in fairies" while watching Peter Pan...you wanna scream "NO!"

I want to share why I believe/believed in Santa.  I grew up believing in the big guy.  There was a certain magic I always felt on Christmas Eve, like something great was happening.  I gotta be honest, I still feel that way every Christmas.  I may not get up as early as I used to, but I still feel that excitement knowing that even if there weren't a single present under that tree, the day was going to magical, where great memories would be made.  There was a certain wonder about snow and Santa and stars...and remembering miracles taking place thousands of years ago in mangers.  I decided to allow my kids to believe in Santa, because Santa represented to me kindness, and a giving spirit.  A lot of times, like Charlie Brown says, the whole Christmas thing becomes a big "commercial racket".  The kindness and giving spirit I want to be in my boys, not about the toys or the commercialism that often tries to creep into the holiday's.  Which is a different problem I'm having with my youngest, who has asked Santa for : an iPod touch, a DS, an Xbox 360, and games for the DS and 360.  None of which we can really afford this year.  In trying to explain that he might not get these things, it's "Santa doesn't have to buy them, he makes all his stuff!".  Oh dear....

This holiday season, I am going to remember all my Christmas' and Santa and think about what made that special.  Was it the toys "Santa" brought me?  Cause I honestly don't remember one that was from him.  I do remember the joy and family, and music, and laughter that always is, and always will be.  So while I ponder whether to let my kids in on the secret, or how to let them in, I'm going to make sure and always remember why Christmas is celebrated.  The One who brings hope.  The Prince of Peace. 

Merry Christmas!

Schools out for the summer! Almost

The kids are almost out of school.  Crazy!  I will have a 2nd and 4th grader on my hands!  My boys have grown up so much this past year.  They are my light and my joy, my blessings from Heaven (and sometimes I have to remind myself of that).  Ethan was in a play this year, Alice In Wonderland, and he stepped out of his comfort zone a little bit and I'm so proud of him for that.  He is my worry wart, so I'm hoping as he grows we can teach him to let go and be free, be a kid!  I know I tried for so long to be "grown up" when I was younger, now I feel as if I definitely want to recapture that freedom of a child.  So it's hard for me to see Ethan (or any kid) having to deal with a lot of stress. 

Elijah, since he was born, has been a live wire (and actually that goes back to when he was in the womb!!)  We are trying to find what his passion is going to be.  We are signing both him and Ethan up for Karate (a 12 week course), and we will look into sports too.  He can be frustrating one second and a complete joy the next.  What we need to work on with him is patience (darn it, I think we all could use help in that area).  This summer I'm hoping to be able to teach him patience, and not hurry.  Cause when we hurry, we often mess things up and it takes us twice as long to get it done than if we would have just slowed down and did it right in the first place. 

Most importantly, we are going to be reading this summer.  The library puts on a summer reading program every year that we've participated in.  This summer the kids will be able to read a lot of the books on their own, which will be a first.  They love to read!  And we've found a lot of movies that they like were books first (they are going through the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series after seeing the movie, and Ethan and I are going through Harry Potter again).  

I'm looking forward to their summer break.  :-)  Hope everyone has a great summer!

Bullying

I have to write a blog about this, cause it's something that is really disturbing to me.  I think most of us at one time or another has been bullied.  I have myself, and the reason for it was a nothing issue, not even a problem, a stupid she said, she said, and told someone else kind of deal.  But I did get threatened to get beat up.  I was terrified at school, and of course, at the time, I didn't have friends that would back me up, partly because they themselves where terrified.  This happened in middle school.  I don't remember there ever being an "understanding", but I do remember eventually the girl forgot about it, and it was ok.  When I got into high school, I was in a play with the girl, and she said, "don't I know you?" and I told her that she had once threatened to beat me up in middle school.  She didn't remember doing that she said, but she laughed and said she probably did and she was sorry.  Something that terrorized me and she didn't even remember doing it.  Makes me wonder how often that is the case.  Are the bully's really angry?  Do they realize what they are doing to the other person?

The "bully" situation has gotten way out of hand though.  Kids are tormented in their own minds some time, and a wrong word, or picking on and teasing someone could end up in a life ended.  I watch children for a living, different age groups and it seems so hard day to day for kids.  My oldest son wears glasses, forgot them one day, and they spent the day teasing him cause one of his eye goes in toward his nose sometime.  Older, bigger, boys picking on little girls, threatening to kick their butts.  I was always taught boys NEVER hit girls, and we are to protect those smaller than ourselves.  It breaks my heart to see a girl terrified to get on the bus.  Scared to go outside of her own house for fear of running into a neighbor that might threaten to hurt her.  

PLEASE teach your kids that this is not ok.  This is such a sad problem and it has to stop!!

Constantly learning

I'm constantly learning.  Learning about myself and about others.  It's so funny to look back at the way learning and knowledge evolve.  I've heard that we learn the most as babies.  We have these huge milestones because we come here knowing only basic skills.  Our bodies are constantly changing and every thing we do is an accomplishment.  Just getting our hands to our mouth is a milestone.  We learn to tell our muscles what to do.  I run an in home daycare, and have worked with children for most of my life.  The more I think I know, the more I find out the less I know!  I worked in a daycare center in the "Baby room" before I had kids of my own, thinking that when I had children of my own, everything would fall into place nicely cause of my experience.  How wrong I was!  I think parenting is such a humbling journey.  Maybe just a constant reminder that we are always learning.  I mean, have you noticed that when you think back on times when you are confident in your knowledge (for example, when you are a teenager and you know it all), just to get put into a situation where you are in over your head and come crashing down?  Pride comes before a fall?  I am just trying to make sure I stay humble now, and say, "you know, I don't know it all, please teach me!"  Or, "What can I learn from this?"  It honestly makes the trials more bearable and the good times more fun :-) What did you learn today?